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Category Archives: caregiving

hoops

attitude Breathing-Fragile-Life caregiving choice compassion conscientious-ness Joan Winifred love peace trust Truth

Thank You:) for Reading …in case it isn’t obvious:

i am NO hula hooper. 😉 lol

(figuratively speaking)

An imperfect observation by me:  i can be “fussy” at times myself…we all have our preferences, and moody/ier days, eh?:)

however…i try to be forgiving and considerate of Others’, their feelings, etc.  and cooperate within a healthy reasonable spectrum…to keep the peace.  And, we all have our limitations and consciences. i know, personally, couldn’t demand/insist on Anyone breaking their conscience in some matter micro or macro…(on my behalf).

We all have our individual thresholds for being comfortable and uncomfortable. I respect that.

Some of us (perhaps sick? unreasonable? fierce? ignorant? too proud?) people are impossible/beyond pleasing; You “kindly” jump through one or two hoops, in good faith, then they unmercilessly require series of hoops and jumps…unending.

gimme a break…”not open to any agreement” is a negative trait interestingly described 2 Timothy 3:1-5: (my highlights)

But know this, that in the last days critical times hard to deal with will be here.  For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, haughty, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, disloyal,  having no natural affection, not open to any agreement, slanderers, without self-control, fierce, without love of goodness,  betrayers, headstrong, puffed up with pride, lovers of pleasures rather than lovers of God,  having an appearance of godliness but proving false to its power; and from these turn away.

So, just want to encourage any Reader:) do Your Best. Trying to Please (some) People is futile! I am no people pleaser.

I’ve found it much easier and conscience healing to please Yahweh–God of True LOVE…by trying to be forgiving, loving, giving, and genuinely-compassionate to all crossing my path…and not overly-critical, harsh and i.m.p.o.s.s.i.b.l.e. to make comfortable/happy/pleased.

questions for self-reflections:

Am i hard to make comfortable? Do i have unrealistic expectations?

am i hurting so much that i am hurting Others? Am i reasonable in my dealings with Others?

do i show fellow-feeling? and agape love/respect to all my fellow-life?

BTW: this is an honest/TRUTH FULL piece of prose..(my blog/this site) is NOT a work of fiction. i am a LEGIT person, with a LEGIT name, though Joan Winifred…i use as my “pen” name, which is my “actual” first two names given me by my parents, (what were they thinking, eh?:)

I am a female…born. I am a Mother…real since ’99, ’01, ’03, ’05  (4 offspring; 1 boy, 3 girls–vaginal births; married since ’91 to Chato/Father of said offspring). Soon to be 50. I am a legit work in progress. 🙂 Very spiritually minded. My Primary Loyalty Yahweh; meaning i love everyone else less than True God of bible revealed name Yahweh/Jehovah. (My “True” Friends accept this unreservedly about me.) And I Love Humans A VERY LOT!! which try to demonstrate by living genuine-unselfish-compassion everyday toward all life even—when very difficult— involving self-sacrifice and pain!! Favorite Books–Bible.

Learner of Fun and relaxation…and Mandarin among other languages.

Legit: Boring. Not a Quitter. Lover of Truth; Pursuer of Peace and Living Moderation in most things except study and love!:)

may be those are not humble self-descriptions, huh?

anyway trying my best…”hammering” things out…🙂 lol

Encouraging reading today:

He will not judge by what appears to his eyes, nor reprove simply according to what his ears hear. He will judge the lowly with fairness, and with uprightness he will give reproof.​—Isa. 11:3, 4.

Jehovah preserved the Law covenant for us in his Word, the Bible. He wants us, not to obsess over the details of the Law, but to discern and apply its “weightier matters,” the lofty principles that underpin its commandments. (Matt. 23:23) The Mosaic Law reflected a “framework of the knowledge and of the truth” about Jehovah and his righteous principles. (Rom. 2:20) The cities of refuge, for example, teach […] how to “judge with true justice,” and they teach all of us how to “deal with one another in loyal love and mercy.” (Zech. 7:9) [excerpted Imitate Jehovah’s Justice & Mercy w 2017]

2/12/19 @10:26 a.m.

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S & L

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snoozing and losing

snooze much–lose much??

snooze little–lose little??

NO Snoozing–NO Losing?! 🙂

(Not talking physical sleep; spiritual slumber is harmful whereas physical sleep restorative.)

An observation: imperfect: mine:

Some of us lose out on a lot spiritually sleep walking through much of our lives. We are caught unawares and unwise. With our mind’s eyes shut/closed…We fail to prioritize the most important components of life which would bring us the deepest satisfaction and happiness…and JOY. (My P.O.V.)

I don’t get enough physical sleep mostly due to forces beyond my control, (that’s my excuse and i’m sticking with it for now;) i.e. sick kid(s)/family member(s), etc. And force within my self-control…UP too late learning)…attempting to know what i don’t now know.

Wish i could sleep when i want/need to sleep. Life doesn’t always cooperate, eh?;)

In my personal readings of the Bible…there are warnings to stay on the watch; pay attention—CARE fully. Caring does have something to do with it; for sure. Caring about the correct things…aka what is truly worthy of care/concern.

I CARE ABOUT LIFE! ALL LIFE.

At my mind gym…we had a special visitor this week..who briefly spoke about […] which got my mind churning about “criteria”  for my choices…is the slight inspiration for this post. He brought up 3 topics for consideration which are very practical—for all of us—to deeply consider individually.

  1. morality
  2.  doctrine
  3.  organization

Personally, my base line morality is: RESPECT FOR LIFE. Which is a BIG blanket…comfy! covers;)…many “specifics” in life including bed and bedding. lol:)

Usually, keeps me warm and my conscience feeling healthy…(aka  one thing NOT keeping me up at night.)

my choices, my refrains, my symbolic gestures, etc…i always wear my seat belt and drive the speed limit. I stopped skiing, at Hubby’s request, due to fear of m.a.j.o.r. injuries. Am much better at ice skating, and enJOY that Winter sport; less spills for me. I respect the sacredness of blood, so i don’t consume this life force in any form. I respect young life, so no abortion. I respect old life, so i respect authority; accept counsel from my parents, grandparents and feel elderly ones are a source of wisdom and should be loved and taken care. I respect male life and female life and innate differences are valued by me which entails/encompasses cooperation, peace.

Also, “Potential” is a value…potential life–should be protected/respected…which means, to me, sex inside marriage. Young/new life is worthy of loving-protective-stable male/female teachers, (e.g., parents aka more experienced life helping inexperienced life succeed with pertinent life lessons).

I believe both males and females aka “parents” “generators” of life: sperm/egg …have much to bring of VALUE to the working/functioning table of life–from which–young/less-experienced/newer on the scene/life can learn/need to learn.

I respect animal life, though, i do eat meat in moderation. (So, this shows/indicates: I elevate/value human/fellow-breathing-fragile-life-species/capacities/potentials over animal/fellow-breathing-fragile-life-species to some degree. I do love animals, too. Especially, the tasty kind, just joking!lol or the fluffy/cute kind!:) I am SERIOUSLY disgusted by wanton abuses and merciless murders of precious life in general. I reject violence. I reject war. I save bugs and don’t stomp on them…cause hey, i am a bug myself. Have annoyed many in my lifetime; i’m sure.:) and maybe?? You Reader:)…find this post pestering?!! OOPS.

I “attempt” to live Agape Love to the best of my very-imperfect abilities in my dealings/interactions/communications with all my fellow-life out of respect & love of life.

I’m glad to be alive! And I Do Respect Others have differing values/criteria and respect they make different choices than me.  I am just “explaining” my personal values/choices and connections…which seem tied & teethered appropriately/logically within frame of Respect For Life moral value.

I don’t mean to be mean…and/or turn this into a long list of do nots…just “brief” examples of how my ‘base’ morality flows: Valuing: “Respect For Life” touches/connects/knots various choices together i personally make.

Doctrine: TRUTH. I investigate/”care” FULLY (cause i care fully) examine everything–of interest–to be sure my knowledge (or acceptance thereof) is reasonably ‘accurate’ on a given topic including religion. (And whether or not Respect For Life is demonstrated/manifested..and how, when, why, where.)

True and false exist. Many of us fail to take the necessary time and/or are mentally lazy, don’t care, and sleepily accept/eat/fall for false notions, outright-obnoxious lies, and incomplete information or mis/disinformation which is distracting, damaging, and/or deadly!:(

Hey, i wanna keep living, THANKS!:)

From my perspective: means Trusting Truth & Respecting Life.

My Respect For Life informs: I don’t want to “stupidly” cut life short or snooze and lose!! or booze..nope, not an over-drinker…my respect for life takes me down the route of m.o.d.e.r.a.t.i.o.n.

(So, i’ve never smoked and never will. I “try” not to make rash/dash…overly-emotional decisions before gathering adequate/enough evidence of accuracy. Which takes time and patience/tenacity /endurance/care…courage.)

Wonder why i’m TIRED!;)

Plus, i’ve found: Truly Respecting Life not only eloooooongates, but ELEVATES quality of living/life.🙂

Organization: When analyzing ANY/ALL organization(s): i.e., government, business, religion, education, club, etc. and/or whether to support or join:

My Morality: “Respect For Life” and Doctrine: “Truth” come into play major.

Does this organization/religion/business/club: Respect Life or Take Life?? What about Truth?? Does this particular organization: teach, implement, practice what is TRUE??! And to a reasonable degree??

to me: it’s not that overly-complicated…trusting truth and respecting life…are simply logical and beneficial🙂…and for myself and for Others

I really appreciate when Others have Respect For Life/my life!!:)

I am spiritually awake to:

  1. Respect For Life (and to what degree/how deeply)?!
  2.  Doctrine: Truth. Is this (?) True/Accurate: (on the surface or deeply)?!
  3. IF ANY ORGANIZATION does not adhere to morality and doctrine 1 + 2 = criteria/test…i take notice. I reject. I abstain.

{Yes, I have other (numbers/values) that can/may be added to my analysis/equation formula…not enumerated above…for the sake of keeping this post: short/concise/simple/succinct as possible.}

And when in doubt, i sit it out…or i research more and remain neutral/non-participatory..because of my deep love & respect for the precious gift of life! 🙂

I accept/realize not everyone sees things/investigates—like me—through this spiritual lens of Respecting Life & Trusting Truth…so, they will view and do differently than me. That is their prerogative!

And whatever our particular prerogatives/our choices–we all live with our own consequences!

Actually, these two values R.L. & T.T. help me feel better/more positively about my very imperfect/very much a work in progress: ever learning/changing self.

THANKS Reader for understanding.

Another “personal” observation: acquired over time: My Day seems to go Okay when i continue Respecting Life & Trusting Truth!:) and these values have been with me since Youth..(i’ll be 50 March 2019)…

Partly because of my Parents. Partly because of my (Bible & Other) education. Partly because of my association. Partly because…

 

 

(2/1/15 @ 3:04p.m.)

Peace/Respect to You Reader:)

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Musings of a Mother

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Peaceful Greeting(s) Fellow-Earthling(s):)

Thanks:) for making my post a part of Your day. Yes, I am a Mother…of four offspring…specifically teenagers! Some musings to follow. (My time constraints–today–do not allow for me to give the necessary attention/focus to writing all of these musings swirling in my mind. I may or may not turn this post into a series of connected content.)

From my limited-personal-point-of-view: it seems a lot of us, Earthlings, like to label/identify ourselves by our higher and/or highest values of which we feel proud…(parents or not or mature or not/younger and older alike). The parenting project/my particular parenting project is a shared endeavor with my husband of 27 years (we became parents by surprise about 8 years in)…an/one important work of mine in progress which initially seemed entailed 20 years…on average?! is one I DO NOT WANT TO FAIL!;(

Like any on the job training (kind of) position…there is learning curve and ups and downs, eh? The first kid is the guinea pig. I was the guinea pig in my family. What has helped guide this daunting process, for me, has been timeless and relevant ancient wisdom (e.g., Biblical).

In some ways, these are abnormal times in which we all live with normal parenting concerns/anxieties…aka trying to survive/thrive..do your best with what you got to work with. Do abnormal times call for unconventional or conventional parenting skills??…the parenting plan/purpose–well-adjusted, healthy-well-functioning physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually high-functioning mature, superlatively-educated, selfless, interdependent adult whom will contribute positively to community/society/brotherhood of humanity…may take longer than 20 years..eh?!;)

Seriously, at 49 years, i still have lots to learn…as Mother, Wife, Friend, Human, (etc. the uncapitalized..(pun? intended))…whatever other label(s) suit(?) me. My clothing of choice is agape love…as well as trying to dress in mildness and humility, meekness and self-control. (Writings, interactions and communications with kids and adults is like weather! You/One can be the hurricane, tornado, windstorm, rainstorm, dark cloud or ray of sunshine, rainbow, cool breeze, gentle/refreshing dew drop.)

the Doo-Wop…music to any situation…or writing…we all can add love.:) Musical tastes differ…as well as parenting styles.

IDK, may be? we all need a “monotone” message of “love” to keep humanity on happy track.

Is parenting more effective when it/(the process) is a selfless-labor-of-love?!…and not excluding tough love neither.

At times–it’s quite difficult to put your own feelings/preferences aside–as Mother–in pursuit of best interests for my child. To be an effective/good? mother means i need to be less selfish. My kids’ need to learn/grow…and say about environment/ecosystem here in Florida. I hate snakes, my kids don’t. Will i allow my hate for snakes to override/ruin their relationship with snakes?

My peculiar set of worries/anxieties…of course, the parenting course…have impacted my teens. Am trying to keep it to a minimum. Striking the balance of helping them be aware of danger of i.e. snakes (including more important concerns)…respecting…snakes, life, love, family, community…choices and consequences, etc. both positives and negatives..at the same time acknowledging, we, parents cannot take (a) kid(s) and drop him/her off at the ocean without any preparation or swimming lessons…and expect them to float and not drown nor be eaten/bitten by sharks!!

Is parenting primarily life guard?! 

So many (mind boggling?) variables can shape our parenting styles. I tend to declutter or edit (meaning i despise complicated so-called solutions to simple problems)…living and parenting, to me, boils down to learning (simply?!;)) to be less selfish everyday! When each of us, parent and child, learn to put others’ interests ahead of our own…we tend to make wiser-longer-sighted-positive choices…that benefit more than self…in the moment. (A life time is more than moments…or more moments make up a life span.)

As a spiritually-minded parent, I have always tried putting spiritual things/endeavors first…meaning also: have attempted to instill “spiritual” over material values in my kids…this excerpted reading explains some of my reasons why much better than i can articulate:

17. Why is the life of those who make no room for the Creator not truly meaningful?

17 Contrast this with what people have who, even though not being morally corrupt, make no room for the Creator in their lives. They may have the honor and the material possessions that they desire, perhaps find a measure of satisfaction in helping the needy and enjoy cultural activities and wholesome pleasures. Yet, they must admit the inescapable fact that nothing in this world has any real permanence. No one is immune to accidents, disease or death. Possessions will neither protect against these things nor can they be taken along when life ends. (Psalm 49:6-20; Ecclesiastes 5:13-15; 8:8) Well-meaning efforts to help fellow humans may come to frustration because of unfavorable circumstances. So it might well be asked: How meaningful can a life be if the ultimate future it offers is just the grave? How can it be good if it actually works against a person’s eternal future?​—Compare Ecclesiastes 1:11, 15, 18; 2:10, 11; 9:11, 12. [excerpted reading: Making the Right Choice: Choosing the Best Way of Life, Chapter 1, pp. 11-12]

Sticky note Scripture:

Do nothing out of contentiousness or out of egotism, but with humility*(or lowliness of mind) consider others superior to you, 4 as you look out not only for your own interests, but also for the interests of others. (Philippians 2:3, 4)

Questions for reflections:

as parent, partner, friend, fellow-breathing-fragile-life aka human:

am i contentious or egotistical?

am i humble?

am i willing to learn from Others (including younger life and older life)…meaning do i have the mindset that Others are superior to me?

am i just looking out for my own best interests?

am i looking out for the best interests of Others?

how will being less selfish help…any/all situations/interactions/communications/relationships/circumstances??

 

11/03/18 @ 2:28 p.m.

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