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Category Archives: caregiving

Musings of a Mother

appreciation attitude book Breathing-Fragile-Life caregiving change choice communication compassion conscientious-ness control education humility Joan Winifred love mind food parenting questions safety spiritual food stress management

Peaceful Greeting(s) Fellow-Earthling(s):)

Thanks:) for making my post a part of Your day. Yes, I am a Mother…of four offspring…specifically teenagers! Some musings to follow. (My time constraints–today–do not allow for me to give the necessary attention/focus to writing all of these musings swirling in my mind. I may or may not turn this post into a series of connected content.)

From my limited-personal-point-of-view: it seems a lot of us, Earthlings, like to label/identify ourselves by our higher and/or highest values of which we feel proud…(parents or not or mature or not/younger and older alike). The parenting project/my particular parenting project is a shared endeavor with my husband of 27 years (we became parents by surprise about 8 years in)…an/one important work of mine in progress which initially seemed entailed 20 years…on average?! is one I DO NOT WANT TO FAIL!;(

Like any on the job training (kind of) position…there is learning curve and ups and downs, eh? The first kid is the guinea pig. I was the guinea pig in my family. What has helped guide this daunting process, for me, has been timeless and relevant ancient wisdom (e.g., Biblical).

In some ways, these are abnormal times in which we all live with normal parenting concerns/anxieties…aka trying to survive/thrive..do your best with what you got to work with. Do abnormal times call for unconventional or conventional parenting skills??…the parenting plan/purpose–well-adjusted, healthy-well-functioning physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually high-functioning mature, superlatively-educated, selfless, interdependent adult whom will contribute positively to community/society/brotherhood of humanity…may take longer than 20 years..eh?!;)

Seriously, at 49 years, i still have lots to learn…as Mother, Wife, Friend, Human, (etc. the uncapitalized..(pun? intended))…whatever other label(s) suit(?) me. My clothing of choice is agape love…as well as trying to dress in mildness and humility, meekness and self-control. (Writings, interactions and communications with kids and adults is like weather! You/One can be the hurricane, tornado, windstorm, rainstorm, dark cloud or ray of sunshine, rainbow, cool breeze, gentle/refreshing dew drop.)

the Doo-Wop…music to any situation…or writing…we all can add love.:) Musical tastes differ…as well as parenting styles.

IDK, may be? we all need a “monotone” message of “love” to keep humanity on happy track.

Is parenting more effective when it/(the process) is a selfless-labor-of-love?!…and not excluding tough love neither.

At times–it’s quite difficult to put your own feelings/preferences aside–as Mother–in pursuit of best interests for my child. To be an effective/good? mother means i need to be less selfish. My kids’ need to learn/grow…and say about environment/ecosystem here in Florida. I hate snakes, my kids don’t. Will i allow my hate for snakes to override/ruin their relationship with snakes?

My peculiar set of worries/anxieties…of course, the parenting course…have impacted my teens. Am trying to keep it to a minimum. Striking the balance of helping them be aware of danger of i.e. snakes (including more important concerns)…respecting…snakes, life, love, family, community…choices and consequences, etc. both positives and negatives..at the same time acknowledging, we, parents cannot take (a) kid(s) and drop him/her off at the ocean without any preparation or swimming lessons…and expect them to float and not drown nor be eaten/bitten by sharks!!

Is parenting primarily life guard?! 

So many (mind boggling?) variables can shape our parenting styles. I tend to declutter or edit (meaning i despise complicated so-called solutions to simple problems)…living and parenting, to me, boils down to learning (simply?!;)) to be less selfish everyday! When each of us, parent and child, learn to put others’ interests ahead of our own…we tend to make wiser-longer-sighted-positive choices…that benefit more than self…in the moment. (A life time is more than moments…or more moments make up a life span.)

As a spiritually-minded parent, I have always tried putting spiritual things/endeavors first…meaning also: have attempted to instill “spiritual” over material values in my kids…this excerpted reading explains some of my reasons why much better than i can articulate:

17. Why is the life of those who make no room for the Creator not truly meaningful?

17 Contrast this with what people have who, even though not being morally corrupt, make no room for the Creator in their lives. They may have the honor and the material possessions that they desire, perhaps find a measure of satisfaction in helping the needy and enjoy cultural activities and wholesome pleasures. Yet, they must admit the inescapable fact that nothing in this world has any real permanence. No one is immune to accidents, disease or death. Possessions will neither protect against these things nor can they be taken along when life ends. (Psalm 49:6-20; Ecclesiastes 5:13-15; 8:8) Well-meaning efforts to help fellow humans may come to frustration because of unfavorable circumstances. So it might well be asked: How meaningful can a life be if the ultimate future it offers is just the grave? How can it be good if it actually works against a person’s eternal future?​—Compare Ecclesiastes 1:11, 15, 18; 2:10, 11; 9:11, 12. [excerpted reading: Making the Right Choice: Choosing the Best Way of Life, Chapter 1, pp. 11-12]

Sticky note Scripture:

Do nothing out of contentiousness or out of egotism, but with humility*(or lowliness of mind) consider others superior to you, 4 as you look out not only for your own interests, but also for the interests of others. (Philippians 2:3, 4)

Questions for reflections:

as parent, partner, friend, fellow-breathing-fragile-life aka human:

am i contentious or egotistical?

am i humble?

am i willing to learn from Others (including younger life and older life)…meaning do i have the mindset that Others are superior to me?

am i just looking out for my own best interests?

am i looking out for the best interests of Others?

how will being less selfish help…any/all situations/interactions/communications/relationships/circumstances??

 

11/03/18 @ 2:28 p.m.

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comfort food

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All of us need some comfort food…(a Dear Friend of mine today…gave me some; just at the right/appropriate time…Encouraging Words to carry on. Grateful!:))

Finding comfort can be like finding Truth. Pieces of the Puzzle…you may have a t, u or an h…and resolve/dedication…never giving up the quest for accuracy…in all things/matters…that matter most.

“A word spoken at the right time​—how good it is!”​—Prov. 15:23

excerpted brief reading: [reference: W November 2016–“Keep On Encouraging One Another Each Day“]

Some parents do not commend their children because their own parents never gave them any encouragement. Many employees are not being commended, so they complain that there is a chronic shortage of encouragement in the workplace. Encouragement often involves commending a person for something he or she did well. We can also be encouraging by reassuring others that they have good qualities or by speaking “consolingly to those who are discouraged.” (1 Thess. 5:14, ftn.)

Do we use suitable occasions to let others know why we love and appreciate them?

 

10/18/18 @ 5:03 p.m.
P.s. @ 6:03 p.m. 10/18/18

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women & men

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Men and Women deserve dignity.

Of course, as a woman, i may feel “sensitive” toward the plight of women. And i feel sad about the plight of men, too. Both male and female are SADLY suffering!🙁 …Before, after, and during 9/11…and beyond.

pain-the-common-shared-human-experience-connecting-us-to-each-other/

Well-founded Hope helps me cope. 🙂

RIP 

9/11/18 @ 10:10 p.m.

 

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Oh S., “Suffering Succotash”

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“The whole world is lying in the power of the wicked one.” (1 John 5:19)

Suffering?? Of course You are and of course i am…in different ways most likely or in similarly ways …as well, nah! as awful.

Fellow-Sufferer…Please find the following informative and comforting…🙂

That “wicked one” is Satan the Devil, a powerful spirit creature who was originally an angel of God but “did not stand fast in the truth.” (John 8:44) Other spirit creatures joined Satan and rebelled against God in order to pursue selfish desires, thus making themselves demons. (Genesis 6:1-5) Ever since their rebellion, Satan and his demons have exerted a powerful and cruel influence over this world’s affairs. This has been particularly so in our time. Now, the Devil has great anger and “is misleading the entire inhabited earth,” which has resulted in “woe for the earth.” (Revelation 12:9, 12) Indeed, Satan is a brutal dictator. He gets perverse satisfaction from human suffering. It is Satan​—not God—​who causes people to suffer.

CONSIDER: Only a heartless, diabolical evildoer would cause innocent people to suffer. By contrast, the Bible says: “God is love.” (1 John 4:8) In harmony with his loving personality, “it is unthinkable for the true God to act wickedly, for the Almighty to do wrong!”​—Job 34:10.

However, you may naturally wonder, ‘How long will Almighty God permit Satan to continue his heinous rule?’ As we have seen, God abhors wickedness and our suffering causes him great pain. Furthermore, his Word urges: “Throw all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:7)

It’s especially tough/(seemingly unbearable)–i’ve found–when a loved one suffers and efforts to help seem useless.  I’ve found the following comforting and HOPE You do:)

When you or someone close to you is suffering, it is easy to conclude that God is slow to act, that he should have intervened by now. Yet, the Bible assures us: “Jehovah is not slow concerning his promise, as some people consider slowness, but he is patient with you because he does not desire anyone to be destroyed but desires all to attain to repentance.”​—2 Peter 3:9.

WHEN WILL GOD ACT?

Very soon! Jesus revealed that a particular generation would witness a unique combination of conditions that would mark the last days of a “system of things.” (Matthew 24:3-42) The fulfillment of Jesus’ prophecy in our day indicates that God’s intervention in human affairs is imminent. 

But how will God bring an end to all suffering? When Jesus was on the earth, he demonstrated God’s power to alleviate mankind’s suffering. Consider some examples of this.

Natural Disasters: While Jesus and his apostles were sailing on the Sea of Galilee, a violent windstorm threatened to sink their boat. But Jesus showed that he and his Father can control the natural elements. (Colossians 1:15, 16) Jesus simply said: “Hush! Be quiet!” The result? “The wind abated, and a great calm set in.”​—Mark 4:35-39.

Sickness: Jesus was well-known for his ability to heal the blind and the lame, as well as those suffering from epilepsy, leprosy, or any other sort of infirmity. “He cured all who were suffering.”​—Matthew 4:23, 24;8:16; 11:2-5.

Food Shortages: Jesus used powers granted to him by his Father to multiply meager food supplies. It is recorded that twice during his ministry, he fed thousands.​—Matthew 14:14-21; 15:32-38.

Death: That Jehovah has the power to undo death is clearly shown by the three resurrections Jesus is recorded to have performed. One of those whom he brought back to life had been dead for four days.​—Mark 5:35-42; Luke 7:11-16; John 11:3-44. [God Will Soon End All Suffering W no. 3 2018]

7/19/18 @ 12:12 p.m.

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