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appreciation Breathing-Fragile-Life communication compassion conscientious-ness heart Joan Winifred

Preachy?? & Teachy?!
Sure, i am. Oh, come on, we all get PUMPED UP and P-U-S-H-Y, at times, and PASSIONATE!!…(topics may vary considerably among individuals).

Under and/or Overlooked by some…Spirituality–is crucial to well-being! We are beings and who doesn’t want to be well??! (btw: i am exhausted writing this…been staying up way too late 2-4 a.m. and partially due to  (busy learning brain) caring for sick kids…with barking asthma coughs. (Who can sleep sound when your kids’ breathing is NOISY? and needs monitoring.) Breathing–a gift–i don’t take for granted!)

In my POV, a healthy spiritual mind-set fosters a healthy physical body and healthy decision making processes that impact mind/body for the better. Healthy Spiritual Values impact life positively. (Yawn, YAWN)…sorry, to make You yawn…don’t fall asleep just yet. Please read on…

Actually, the intention of this post is a part two of Us Talkers. IF You like to talk or IF you like to listen…please read post first for the following context.

When we talk…the reaction/response we get…”probably” depends on the HEART LISTENING…:)

How do these people from Jesus’ hometown react to what they might see as unfavorable historical comparisons that expose their selfishness and lack of faith? Those in the synagogue get angry, rise up, and rush Jesus outside the city. They take him to the brow of the mountain upon which Nazareth is built, and they try to throw him over the edge. But Jesus escapes from their grasp and gets away safely. Jesus now heads down to Capernaum, on the northwest shore of the Sea of Galilee. [excerpted: At the Synagogue in Nazareth Jesus–the Way, Chapter 21]

Talking/teaching/preaching…with illustrations and scriptures…gets to the “heart of the matter” aka reveals the present heart condition of the individual…spiritually healthy? spiritually unhealthy? selfish? selfless? humble? arrogant? hurtful? kind?…responding in kind.

Perhaps what we say and how we say it…truly matters…on one hand, in one heart..but perhaps, on the other hand, in another heart…what truly matters most (when we-fellow-fragile-life engage in communication) is the (heart) soil (condition) from which a response (understanding) grows.

Hoping these posts help grow…Compassionate Heart Flowers aka Kind Words & Kind Deeds. 🙂

“[…]for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. […]

the entire counsel from this scripture:  Jesus rebuking the Pharisees…

Offspring of vipers, how can you speak good things when you are wicked? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.  35 The good man out of his good treasure sends out good things, whereas the wicked man out of his wicked treasure sends out wicked things.  36 I tell you that men will render an account on Judgment Day for every unprofitable*(or worthless) saying that they speak;  37 for by your words you will be declared righteous, and by your words you will be condemned.” 

(Matthew 12:34-37) 

Question for Reflection:

What do my words declare about me?

6/3/18 @ 10:38 a.m.

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Us Talkers

Breathing-Fragile-Life communication compassion conscientious-ness education insights Joan Winifred things i learned wisdom

Yep, I am a talker. (But am I a walker, too??)

Successful walking takes serious skill. Without stumbling and face falling or face saving, eh? Successful talking takes serious skill. Without opening mouth and inserting foot or worse, eh?

Okay, so, it’s obvious–I like to talk! However, is it an obvious “right” ? Is free speech the same thing as “freedom” of speech? Do I have the absolute right to determine what the right thing is to say/speak in any moment/situation?

May be? free talking is exhibitionism of a lack of self-control? Or an abundance of arrogance? Or glaring ignorance? Or power hunger?…

 Death and life are in the power of the tongue; Those who love it will eat its fruitage. (Proverbs 18:21)

hmmm, what am i eating??;) savory, sweet or sour?

Article commentary:

THE tongue of the giraffe measures up to 18 inches [45 cm] long and is agile and powerful enough to pluck leaves off tree branches. The blue whale’s tongue weighs as much as an elephant. Imagine the strength needed just to move it!

The human tongue pales in comparison in size, weight, and strength. Yet, it is far more powerful. “Death and life are in the power of the tongue,” says the Bible of this small member of the human body. (Proverbs 18:21) Indeed, how many times have we heard of the human tongue’s death-dealing power being wielded in fabricating lies and false testimonies that have brought ruination, even death, to innocent victims?

Likewise, longtime friendships have been dashed by hurtful remarks. Emotions have been crushed by harsh words. “How long will you men keep irritating my soul and keep crushing me with words?” cried the much-maligned Job. (Job 19:2) The disciple James gave a vivid picture of the destructive power of the unbridled tongue: “The tongue is a little member and yet makes great brags. Look! How little a fire it takes to set so great a woodland on fire! Well, the tongue is a fire.”​—James 3:5, 6.

On the other hand, the power of the tongue can also be life-giving. Empathetic and consoling words have rescued some from depression and suicide. Sound advice, when heeded, has saved many drug abusers and street thugs from untimely death. Truly, the fruitage of a righteous one’s tongue is “a tree of life,” and “as apples of gold in silver carvings is a word spoken at the right time for it.”​—Proverbs 15:4; 25:11. [The Power of the Tongue w 07]

May be, freeness of speech comes/is acquired from a living place of authenticity earned by work/effort/experience/knowledge/discipline/training. It’s evident, most likely, that what I talk/share is what i teach.  What i walk/(my strides)–what i practice/promoteexemplify?

For we all stumble*(or “make mistakes.”) many times. If anyone does not stumble in word, he is a perfect man, able to bridle also his whole body.  3 If we put bridles in the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we guide also their whole body. 4 Look also at ships: Although they are so big and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the man at the helm is inclined to go.

5 So, too, the tongue is a small part of the body, and yet it makes great brags. See how small a fire it takes to set a great forest ablaze! 6 The tongue is also a fire. The tongue represents a world of unrighteousness among our body members, for it defiles all the body and sets the whole course of life*(Lit. “the wheel of the birth” (origin)) on fire, and it is set on fire by Ge·henʹna.* 7 For every kind of wild animal and bird and reptile*(or “creeping thing”) and sea creature is to be tamed and has been tamed by humans. 8 But no human can tame the tongue. It is unruly and injurious, full of deadly poison. 9 With it we praise Jehovah,* the Father, and yet with it we curse men who have come into existence “in the likeness of God.” 10 Out of the same mouth come blessing and cursing.

My brothers, it is not right for things to happen this way. 11 A spring does not cause the fresh*(sweet) water and the bitter water to bubble out of the same opening, does it? 12 My brothers, a fig tree cannot produce olives, or a grapevine figs, can it? Neither can salt water produce fresh water.

13 Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him by his fine conduct demonstrate works performed with a mildness that comes from wisdom. 

(James 3:2-13)

Us talkers/teachers must admit/acknowledge…we have greater accountability and responsibility; that’s an o.b.v.i.o.u.s! Teachers evoke strong emotions, reactions, huh? How many of us have had crushes on our cool teachers? Or despised a strict/tough teacher?

Do teachers have the “right” to determine what is “right” to teach??

A “truth” learned from the example of a “good” teacher…Jesus:

“As he was going on his way, a man ran up and fell on his knees before him and put the question to him: “Good Teacher, what must I do to inherit everlasting life?” 18 Jesus said to him: “Why do you call me good? Nobody is good except one, God.”

Good Teacher: The man was evidently using the words “Good Teacher” as a flattering and formalistic title, since such honor was usually demanded by the religious leaders. While Jesus had no objection to being properly identified as “Teacher” and “Lord” (Joh 13:13), he directed all honor to his Father. (Mark 10:17)

Nobody is good except one, God: Jesus here recognizes Jehovah as the ultimate standard of what is good, the One who has the sovereign right to determine what is good and what is bad. By rebelliously eating from the tree of the knowledge of good and bad, Adam and Eve sought to assume that right. Unlike them, Jesus humbly leaves the setting of standards to his Father. God has expressed and defined what is good by means of what he has commanded in his Word.​—Mr 10:19.

[excerpted: New World Translation Study Edition: Gems]

Jesus taught by way of illustrations. (A respected teacher/male commended me by calling me a “Meisterof Metaphor. This was sincere and a source of encouragement for me and not flattery at all.)  Thinking in illustrations/metaphors can be very useful in learning/teaching.  Illustrations and Bible Scriptures have a way of revealing hearts and things held close/r or valued. However, all of us lack the ability to precisely determine what the complete standards of so-called good and so-called bad are…or should be.

Just because i want to say something…anything about anything…do i have the right to thrust/tweetarticulateassault with words…anywhere/anytime/anyhow?! It’s a complicated conversation…as the scriptures warn: “thoughtless words are like stabs of a sword”…May be IF we all thought more…would we hurt less?!

If my tongue is a sword/knifecutting skills an essential requirement. Do i rough chop, slice and dice, mince, julienne, brunoise, chiffonade? Does all public speaking involve cutting remarks? Public speaking takes training/education/discipline (and well-spent years thereof).  Any type of knife wielding can be dangerous without training

  Their tongue is a deadly arrow that speaks deception. With his mouth a person speaks of peace to his neighbor, But inside he lays an ambush.”  (Jeremiah 9:8)

Our personal power of choice regarding communication…can be constructive vs. destructive.  The power of the Tongue must be respectedFree Speech, Freedom of Speech, and Freeness of speech has the power to bring out the best and the worse in us.

A poignant Proverb…

A worthless man digs up what is bad; His speech is like a scorching fire.  (Proverb 16:27)

“You don’t have to be brilliant or perfect to succeed,” says Dr. Morton C. Orman, an expert on stress and a professional public speaker. “The essence of public speaking is this: give your audience something of value.”

Partners Communicating: Commendation and Counsel Compassionately

Further readings/learnings from Jesus…an extremely exceptional teacher & his speaking/living “truth” trials…

Jesus reads about how this foretold One would preach a release to the captives, a recovery of sight to the blind, and the coming of Jehovah’s acceptable year. Jesus hands the scroll to the attendant and sits down. All eyes are intently fixed upon him. Then he speaks, probably at some length, and his comments include the significant statement: “Today this scripture that you just heard is fulfilled.”​—Luke 4:21.

The people marvel at “the gracious words coming out of his mouth,” and they say to one another: “This is a son of Joseph, is it not?” But realizing that they want to see him perform powerful works like the ones they had heard about, Jesus continues: “No doubt you will apply this saying to me, ‘Physician, cure yourself. Do also here in your home territory the things we have heard were done in Capernaum.’” (Luke 4:22, 23) Jesus’ former neighbors likely feel that healing should begin at home, for the benefit of his own people first. So they may think that Jesus has slighted them.

Realizing their thinking, Jesus mentions some events in Israel’s history. There were many widows in Israel during the days of Elijah, he notes, but Elijah was not sent to any of them. Rather, he went to a non-Israelite widow in Zarephath, a town near Sidon, where Elijah performed a lifesaving miracle. (1 Kings 17:8-16) And in Elisha’s day, there were many lepers in Israel, but the prophet cleansed only Naaman the Syrian.​—2 Kings 5:1, 8-14. [excerpted: At the Synagogue in Nazareth Jesus–the Way, Chapter 21, par. 6 ]

PeaceFellowBreathingFragileLife:)… (also known as Us Talkers.)

 

p.s. how many nuanced words?? (IF i quickly? counted correctly?)

79

78

four

5

 

5/31/18 @ 3:35 p.m.

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Weed(s) & Wild Flower(s)

appreciation attitude Breathing-Fragile-Life communication humility insights Joan Winifred lamentations of the heart leadership logic love moderation never giving up! pain reality respect safety things i learned wisdom worries

(The) perils a plenty of an Extraverted-Friendly-Nature-Chick like me…the hopeful-optimistic kind of fragile-life who enJOYs walking barefoot through blowing wind, grass, mud, dirt, sand, rain, snow…(and figuratively, too…IF needed to get the compassion job done.)

Some messy jobs can be extremely intellectually/physically/spiritually satisfying, You know. 🙂

Just curious…IF?? if…

You’re growing into a strangler/killer (mind) weed “at the ready to repay with evil”…that i should of pulled/chopped at the roots years ago…or (IF?? if) You’re blossoming into an Amazing-Compassion-Perennial-Beautiful-Wild Flower!:)…a Blessing!:)

(i’ll think the latter for now…till sufficiently proven otherwise.)

ummm, think hard joanie: what’s hanging over my head? …LIFE!…etc. idk ;)…(clouds, spiders, webs, clowns, conversations?-lol;)…laundry.

what’s under my feet?…

Caution joanie…bugs bite; gators snap; cats scratch…(even when You Care/Love them lots!).

God knows what He’s doing…!!! (continuing to try my best and let God of Compassion do the rest.)

btw: i’d rather suffer…for the compassionate/right/conscience-easing thing/choice…than suffer because of sheer stupidity/ignorance/complacency…or for the wrong thing.

 

(it’s a cloudy/raining day here in FL) 

Rain does help Wild Flowers grow, huh?:)

1:56 p.m. 5/25/18

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A “JUSTICE” job to do

attitude communication Joan Winifred justice never giving up! pain things i learned

Ugghhhh!!!!! I am VERY MAD. My daughter and I were treated like idiots… by idiots? IF I wasn’t attempting to exercise self-control…I could really tell them off.

The level of incompetency is RIDICULOUS!!!… of course, I attempt to articulate and advocate for justice… concerning a policy change that we were NOT clearly informed nor effectively communicated to about and yet are punished!!

I wrote the above-emotional rant yesterday (Monday)…have since calmed down… of course, on some level probably failed this/my pop compassion test… but, my negative? attitude is I really don’t care… may be? this idiot (namely me) was suppose to share some “sense” with another idiot!;)… about nonsense!!

Guess, am still working on the “mild and quiet spirit”… this indignation just welled up in me…  like a she bear and i was trying to contain her… how dare they arbitrarily refuse to treat my kid!!… because this “unprofessional” aka lacking proper training (as to how to resolve conflict/treat patients, etc.) office assistant/manager/staff fails to c-l-e-a-r-l-y indicate a “new” policy change regarding minors. (This is the type of world we live in people… what happened to good-faith-trust in fellow-fragile-life?!! You know, give ’em the benefit of the doubt.)  I have to prove seemingly on the spot that this is–indeed–my (look-alike) daughter and I am her legal guardian via birth certificate!!… who carries on their person legal documents??

I was inwardly hurt/irate… mind You–have been to this dentist for last couple months, 2 or three times a week with my “minor” kid(s)… the Doctor is great. The Dental Assistants do a great job…the Front Desk People see me there regularly… was just there Friday..and come Monday morning, am treated like an unwelcome stranger by the Woman at the front desk (whom i kindly and friendly have conversed small talk with for weeks and have no personal problem with)… and was coldly told because i don’t have a copy of this document with me… my daughter cannot be seen by the dentist (period).

No MERCY!

No apology whatsoever for any miscommunication or for not explaining/telling me that this is a strict essential requirement now… what to protect minors? yeah, right, no! to protect the office/staff… who knows? what has transpired/happened causing enforcing of this non-negotiable rule?  Asked to speak to the office manager…cause i was not taking NO for an answer! (i don’t take no laying down.) I will tirelessly work, defend, exhaust, argue all angles, sweetly or logically persuade to make an unjust no a just YES. I can be very stubborn. And very tenacious when necessary in matters of integrity. Seemingly “sweet” push-over joanie turns to stone JOAN…unmovable. (Usually when it comes to the truth.)

{Yeah, i got stuff to work on, but don’t we all, eh?!;)}

I was taking this situation way too personally/emotionally…(how naive? to think that you’re in a place of care…that you should be cared about and for, huh?)….who wants to be at the dentist first thing Monday morning anyway? then deal with this indifference and ridiculousness?? and carelessness?

May be should attribute to Monday Morning transitions…?

I asked the Office Manager to produce a written copy of this new policy change (from Management Headquarters) for me to read…right there and then…she could NOT!…excuse me!! yet, she is “requiring” me to produce a legal document on the spot…and penalizing me by refusing care/treatment to my kid, in other words, kicking me and my kid out of the door!!Nice way to treat nice patients, huh?

So, i’m suppose to take her word for it, give her the benefit of the doubt, that this new policy exists and has been enacted by whomever in top management…without any proof…(an unacknowledged (by her) goodwill gesture on my part, eh?) and yet, she won’t do the same for me…aka let my kid keep her appointment (as she has for weeks) and let her receive treatment/help for hurting tooth…till i can produce document next visit.

Harsh NO!

I am attempting to logically reason to this person that perhaps, the front lady mentioned briefly, in passing, non-chalantly would like a copy of birth certificate for records. However, i was not given any detailed explanation verbally or in writing or adequately informed of a new policy that my “minor” child would not be seen without it. Why would i waste my time and show up without needed (unsaid) document?! Why would say a kidnapper take a kid to the…dentist?! DUH;) i inform her my husband/our daughter’s dad has the document in a safe place…and Ugghh! Nothing is working…”OH” “so You refuse!” “to help/accommodate me and my daughter and are kicking me out the door…you know, you realize that is what you are in effect doing…kicking me out!!

She says they have openings this afternoon and my husband/we can come back then with the certificate in hand. “EXCUSE ME!… You’re kidding me, right? we work, and have arranged time, juggling kids, etc. to be here now and have other things to do today…and You are gonna see her now!” “I want to talk to Dr. P….” She tells me no. She won’t get him. “I want the headquarters number to complain.” Please write it down and what’s your name?!”…(How naive of me, she gave me the wrong number!) I said “THANK YOU!” …sarcastically …and stormed out. We were at an impossible impasse…she could not produce a written policy change for me to read. I could not produce my kid’s birth certificate for her to see.

Stupidity!;)…i probably sound very arrogant, and know i need to work on humility…guess, shouldn’t expect to be treated nicely by those you try to treat nicely…

(the whole incident seems like a case of ignorance to me)…

My daughter was completely surprised and said she has never seen me upset with someone like this before in public. Of course, I could of been more detached emotionally and less insistent. I too was SURPRISED by the level of outrageous unreasonableness which struck a justice chord in me.

Mulling this over…may be, the Office Lady was “doing” her Monday morning best and i was “doing” my exhausted best…but neither best helped my daughter’s toothache!:(

Which sorta brings me to the topic of suffering…you can’t lump all suffering into the same box labeled fragile/life. Some suffering may be within our personal control and some out of our control. Some suffering is due to stupidity. Some suffering is due to ignorance. Some suffering is senseless. And some suffering makes…sense.

Time and unforeseen events befall us all…(with or without teeth)… and with or without a birth certificate.

Etc., Etc.,…distinctions to be made…because not all suffering is same or equal…(and in length or degree).

Which reminds me of these verses about suffering:

However, let none of you suffer as a murderer or a thief or a wrongdoer or a busybody in other people’s matters. 16  But if anyone suffers as a Christian, let him not feel ashamed, but let him keep on glorifying God while bearing this name. 17  For it is the appointed time for the judgment to start with the house of God. Now if it starts first with us, what will the outcome be for those who are not obedient to the good news of God? 18  “And if the righteous man is being saved with difficulty, what will happen to the ungodly man and the sinner?” 19  So, then, let those who are suffering in harmony with the will of God keep on entrusting *(or commending) themselves*(or their souls) to a faithful Creator while they are doing good. (1 Peter 4:1-19)

{It’s not easy doing good IF you’re being treated bad, huh?}

4/26/18 @ 12:15 a.m.

Published 4/26/18 @ 11:48 a.m.

P.s. Irony Flashback: used to hear the above-tune every Monday Morning on local radio heading to work… across from Cambridge courthouse at law firm in Cambridge Mass… long before kids, toothaches, Florida laid-back (?) living.

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