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Musings of a Mother

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Peaceful Greeting(s) Fellow-Earthling(s):)

Thanks:) for making my post a part of Your day. Yes, I am a Mother…of four offspring…specifically teenagers! Some musings to follow. (My time constraints–today–do not allow for me to give the necessary attention/focus to writing all of these musings swirling in my mind. I may or may not turn this post into a series of connected content.)

From my limited-personal-point-of-view: it seems a lot of us, Earthlings, like to label/identify ourselves by our higher and/or highest values of which we feel proud…(parents or not or mature or not/younger and older alike). The parenting project/my particular parenting project is a shared endeavor with my husband of 27 years (we became parents by surprise about 8 years in)…an/one important work of mine in progress which initially seemed entailed 20 years…on average?! is one I DO NOT WANT TO FAIL!;(

Like any on the job training (kind of) position…there is learning curve and ups and downs, eh? The first kid is the guinea pig. I was the guinea pig in my family. What has helped guide this daunting process, for me, has been timeless and relevant ancient wisdom (e.g., Biblical).

In some ways, these are abnormal times in which we all live with normal parenting concerns/anxieties…aka trying to survive/thrive..do your best with what you got to work with. Do abnormal times call for unconventional or conventional parenting skills??…the parenting plan/purpose–well-adjusted, healthy-well-functioning physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually high-functioning mature, superlatively-educated, selfless, interdependent adult whom will contribute positively to community/society/brotherhood of humanity…may take longer than 20 years..eh?!;)

Seriously, at 49 years, i still have lots to learn…as Mother, Wife, Friend, Human, (etc. the uncapitalized..(pun? intended))…whatever other label(s) suit(?) me. My clothing of choice is agape love…as well as trying to dress in mildness and humility, meekness and self-control. (Writings, interactions and communications with kids and adults is like weather! You/One can be the hurricane, tornado, windstorm, rainstorm, dark cloud or ray of sunshine, rainbow, cool breeze, gentle/refreshing dew drop.)

the Doo-Wop…music to any situation…or writing…we all can add love.:) Musical tastes differ…as well as parenting styles.

IDK, may be? we all need a “monotone” message of “love” to keep humanity on happy track.

Is parenting more effective when it/(the process) is a selfless-labor-of-love?!…and not excluding tough love neither.

At times–it’s quite difficult to put your own feelings/preferences aside–as Mother–in pursuit of best interests for my child. To be an effective/good? mother means i need to be less selfish. My kids’ need to learn/grow…and say about environment/ecosystem here in Florida. I hate snakes, my kids don’t. Will i allow my hate for snakes to override/ruin their relationship with snakes?

My peculiar set of worries/anxieties…of course, the parenting course…have impacted my teens. Am trying to keep it to a minimum. Striking the balance of helping them be aware of danger of i.e. snakes (including more important concerns)…respecting…snakes, life, love, family, community…choices and consequences, etc. both positives and negatives..at the same time acknowledging, we, parents cannot take (a) kid(s) and drop him/her off at the ocean without any preparation or swimming lessons…and expect them to float and not drown nor be eaten/bitten by sharks!!

Is parenting primarily life guard?! 

So many (mind boggling?) variables can shape our parenting styles. I tend to declutter or edit (meaning i despise complicated so-called solutions to simple problems)…living and parenting, to me, boils down to learning (simply?!;)) to be less selfish everyday! When each of us, parent and child, learn to put others’ interests ahead of our own…we tend to make wiser-longer-sighted-positive choices…that benefit more than self…in the moment. (A life time is more than moments…or more moments make up a life span.)

As a spiritually-minded parent, I have always tried putting spiritual things/endeavors first…meaning also: have attempted to instill “spiritual” over material values in my kids…this excerpted reading explains some of my reasons why much better than i can articulate:

17. Why is the life of those who make no room for the Creator not truly meaningful?

17 Contrast this with what people have who, even though not being morally corrupt, make no room for the Creator in their lives. They may have the honor and the material possessions that they desire, perhaps find a measure of satisfaction in helping the needy and enjoy cultural activities and wholesome pleasures. Yet, they must admit the inescapable fact that nothing in this world has any real permanence. No one is immune to accidents, disease or death. Possessions will neither protect against these things nor can they be taken along when life ends. (Psalm 49:6-20; Ecclesiastes 5:13-15; 8:8) Well-meaning efforts to help fellow humans may come to frustration because of unfavorable circumstances. So it might well be asked: How meaningful can a life be if the ultimate future it offers is just the grave? How can it be good if it actually works against a person’s eternal future?​—Compare Ecclesiastes 1:11, 15, 18; 2:10, 11; 9:11, 12. [excerpted reading: Making the Right Choice: Choosing the Best Way of Life, Chapter 1, pp. 11-12]

Sticky note Scripture:

Do nothing out of contentiousness or out of egotism, but with humility*(or lowliness of mind) consider others superior to you, 4 as you look out not only for your own interests, but also for the interests of others. (Philippians 2:3, 4)

Questions for reflections:

as parent, partner, friend, fellow-breathing-fragile-life aka human:

am i contentious or egotistical?

am i humble?

am i willing to learn from Others (including younger life and older life)…meaning do i have the mindset that Others are superior to me?

am i just looking out for my own best interests?

am i looking out for the best interests of Others?

how will being less selfish help…any/all situations/interactions/communications/relationships/circumstances??

 

11/03/18 @ 2:28 p.m.

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Breaking Up…Fights

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Does pursuing peace mean breaking up fights?? Or getting involved in fights (i.e. political, controversial or other)?

Which fights? Who defines “fight” ? A “cause”  and/or causes worthy of battle/engagement/time/energy/life/interference?!…carnal, psychological, mental, emotional, spiritual, physical…war?

I am no one to beep!…meaning i VERY rarely use my car horn, and any usage is quite judiciously at that. Perhaps, it’s been YEARS (?)..since, well, other than on this past Tuesday afternoon. Today is Thursday, November 1st.

What would You do?…IF…

you’re peacefully, (semi-quietly) alone for approximately 10 minutes (waiting/sitting/meditating/listening to Vivaldi) in your car at the corner of Street X and Street Y–a couple feet before stop sign in the shade–with left-side view of Main Z Street…first come the bikers…aka middle school kids w/stuffed back packs just let out of school-jail wildly racing homeward down popular/well-traveled side-street used by some to get home faster by avoiding Main Z Street traffic.

The usual pattern routine…first come bikers, loners, then first set of walkers, then next wave of walkers including my daughter and her friend…whom i transport home most afternoons. This Tuesday was different. After bikers…i hear a ROAR of a crowd…thought, wow, kids are much more noisier today, eh?

Looked up and to the left…yep, two boys (surrounded/encircled by big bunch of onlookers) going at it…fighting…fisticuffs!! They are simultaneously trying to rip each other’s t-shirts off…(pourquoi? who knows?) the fight has moved into the middle of Street Y…looks like a huge curious crowd of cockroaches has swarmed. Approximately 40-50 kids; mostly in the street and some on both sidewalks.Within seconds more kids are joining in…and the spectator swarm swells.

I eye my daughter and her friend stopped on side-walk checking out the fight. Immediately beep 2-3 short beeps to get her attention to no avail! At that moment, i notice one prevailing-fighter kid looking like he’s trying his best to pound/smash the non-prevailing kid’s head to the concrete.

Uh-OH…head injuries can be serious/fatal…stupid? kids. Immediately and instinctually, i calmly drive toward crowd in middle of street laying l-o-n-g on my extra LOUD horn without any let-up!!  They one and all–at once–disperse and disengage including fighting boys. They take off running and scattering to sidewalks and begin leaving the scene. I roll down my window and assertively/firmly tell my daughter to get in! now.

She calls to her friend to get in our car…as i hear another friend cheering and yelling, “A.’s Mom to the Rescue!”:)

My daughter’s friend is smiling and they (my daughter and friend) laughingly cannot believe I just broke up the fight…with a beep. I didn’t get involved in the fight; which was not my fight; didn’t personally yell at the kids nor pick sides yet handled the situation…before it got too too out of hand…and with the long beep/loud horn strategy managed getting about 50 kids to leave scene and go home before anyone got seriously injured.

Hope they all made it home okay. Hope the fighting is finished.

It came naturally—didn’t think twice—about the horn or driving carefully straight toward crowd in middle of road nor not leaving my vehicle. Before responsible-mature-logical adult action–I had a quick/passing thought about calling police. But by the time they would arrive, fighting kid(s) probably would be quite hurt and all of the kids in needless trouble. It just seemed like involving the authorities would make matters worse. And before those thoughts quickly left my mind–I was already driving and laying on horn. The road easily cleared. We safely road down Street Y…cause

Like someone grabbing hold of a dog’s ears 

Is the one passing by who becomes furious about*(or who possibly meddles in) a quarrel that is not his.  PROverb 26:17

Interesting commentary (for Youths & Adults alike) on this intriguingly-wise Biblical Proverb:

What would happen if you grabbed hold of the ears of a dog? It would hurt the dog, and he would snap at you, wouldn’t he? The more the dog tried to get loose, the harder you would have to hold on to the ears and the more excited the dog would get. If you let him go, he would probably bite you hard. But can you just stand there and hold his ears forever?—

Well, that is the kind of trouble that we would be in if we got mixed up in a fight between other people. We may not know who started the fight or why they are fighting. One person may be getting beaten up, but perhaps he stole something from the other one. If we helped him, we would be helping a thief. That would not be good, would it?

So, what should you do if you see a fight?— If it is at school, you can run and tell a teacher. And if it is away from school, you can call one of your parents or a policeman. Yes, even when other people want to fight, we should be peaceable. [Is It Right to Fight? Learn From the Great Teacher, Chapter 19, p. 106]

my daily intention: pursue peace with all people (younger & older)…while remaining politically neutral at all times.
11/01/18 @ 5:50 p.m.

 

 

 

 

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Being Selective

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Greetings:) Truth-Seeking-Reader.

Truth is a value i hold nearanddear (Not a typo). Since youth “Truth” (pursuing/acquiring/living it) has been my main objective, purpose, vocation, occupation!…obsession?-lol;)

For me, and obvious to any Regular Readers (Thanks for Your Time!:)), my priority is Spiritual/Biblical Truth…which trickles to other Truth topics…i.e., Science, health, etc.

Through the years, have had countless conversations with various Folks (the 🙂 and the 🙁 the pleasant, the disagreeable) from all walks of life, all walks of education, culture, religion including Agnostics and Atheists.

Every One is a teacher; for sure. Both positive and negative…conversations aka transmissions of knowledge…teach…(and possible mold).

Who is molding me?

A reocurring concern/cluster…family of spiritual questions bubbling to the surface among thinking, caring, loving people…seems to be:

Why is there evil?

Why would God allow suffering? When will it end?

IF God is all knowing and all powerful, did God “create” evil?

IF my life is predestined…why bother? (changing, trying, etc.)

Hoping this reading i’ve enJOYed (in the past) will help You now (and in the future)…resolve/reconcile…touch these seemingly tough topics of discussion.

Is Your Future Predestined?

Many people believe that their life and future are predestined by a higher power. They feel that from conception to death, we all follow a script already written in the mind of God. ‘After all,’ they say, ‘God is all-powerful and all-knowing, or omniscient, so surely he must know every detail about the past, the present, and the future.’

WHAT do you think? Does God foreordain our life course and ultimate destiny? In other words, is free will genuine or just an illusion? What does the Bible say?

Total or Selective Foreknowledge?

The Bible leaves us in no doubt as to God’s having foreknowledge. He knows “from the beginning the finale,” says Isaiah 46:10. He even used human secretaries to record many prophecies. (2 Peter 1:21) What is more, those prophecies always come true because God has both the wisdom and the power to fulfill them in every detail. Hence, God can not only foreknow but also foreordain events whenever he chooses to do so. However, does God foreordain the destiny of every human or even the total number who will gain salvation? Not according to the Bible.

The Bible teaches that God is selective when it comes to foreordaining the future. For example, God foretold that “a great crowd” of righteous humans would survive the destruction of the wicked at the end of the present system of things. (Revelation 7:9, 14) Note, though, that God did not give a specific number for that great crowd. The reason? He does not predestinate individuals. God is like the loving father of a large family. He knows that at least some of His children will reciprocate His love, but He does not predetermine the number.

Compare God’s use of foreordination with the way he uses his power. As the Almighty, God has absolute power. (Psalm 91:1; Isaiah 40:26, 28) But does he use his power in an uncontrolled manner? No. For instance, he held back from acting against Babylon, an enemy of ancient Israel, until the time was right. “I kept exercising self-control,” God said. (Isaiah 42:14) The same principle applies to his use of foreknowledge and foreordination. Jehovah exercises self-control in order to respect the free will that he gave us.

God’s control of his powers does not limit  him or render him imperfect. In fact, it magnifies his greatness, and it endears him to us, for it shows that his sovereignty truly is exercised not only with omniscience and power but also with love and respect for the free will of his intelligent creation.

Is God to Blame??

On the other hand, if God predetermines everything, including every nasty accident and vile deed that has ever happened, could we not rightly blame him for all the misery and suffering in the world? Thus, upon closer inspection, the teaching of predestination does not honor God, but casts a pall over him. It paints him as cruel, unjust, and unloving​—the very opposite of what the Bible says about him.​—Deuteronomy 32:4.

The Choice Is Yours

By means of his servant Moses, God said to the nation of Israel: “I have put life and death before you, . . . and you must choose life . . . by loving Jehovah your God, by listening to his voice and by sticking to him; for he is your life and the length of your days.” (Deuteronomy 30:19, 20) Had God predestinated each Israelite either to love him and gain life or to disregard him and merit death, His words would have been both meaningless and insincere. Do you believe that God, “a lover of justice” and the very personification of love, would act in such an arbitrary way?​—Psalm 37:28; 1 John 4:8.

More Questions:

HAVE YOU WONDERED?

▪ To what extent does God exercise foreknowledge?​—Deuteronomy 30:19, 20; Isaiah 46:10.

▪ Why would God not predetermine everything, including the bad things that happen to people?​—Deuteronomy 32:4.

▪ What will ultimately determine our future?​—John 17:3.

God’s purpose and man’s plan(s)…

By means of the Bible, God is, in effect, saying to us: ‘This is my purpose for mankind and the earth, and this is what you should do to gain everlasting life. It is now up to you to decide whether to listen to me or disregard me.’ Yes, how perfectly God balances his powers of foreordination with his respect for our free will! Will you choose life “by listening to [God’s] voice and by sticking to him”? [excerpted reading AWAKE! 2009, Is Your Future Predestined?]

Tackling evil…

Normally, people want to be peaceable, honest, and kind. Why, then, do we often see violence, injustice, and cruelty? Horrific news reports are common. Is there someone trying to make people act badly?Read 1 John 5:19.

Did God make humans with an evil tendency? No, Jehovah God created humans in his image, with a tendency to imitate God’s love. (Genesis 1:27; Job 34:10) But God also dignified humans with free choice. When our first parents chose to act badly, they rejected God’s example and became imperfect. We inherited the tendency to sin from them.Read Deuteronomy 32:4, 5.

God wants us to resist our bad tendencies. (Proverbs 27:11) So he teaches us how to avoid doing wrong and how to find real happiness. At present, though, we cannot imitate God’s love perfectly.Read Psalm 32:8.

Although evil abounds now, God is permitting it for a limited time to allow all to see its sad consequences. (2 Peter 3:7-9) Soon, however, the earth will be filled with happy people who obey God.Read Psalm 37:9-11

[excerpted Where Did Evil Come From? Bible Questions Answered]

Humans:) we have the power of selection. We can choose to use…any talent, gift, knowledge, circumstance…for the good, better, best.

9/30/18 @ 10:56 a.m.

Peace & Purpose:)..to You Reader.

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