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Category Archives: kindness


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Don’t be ripped off…
by the ripper-off-ers!

Don’t be deceived… by the smoking smoke screens!

1. Alcohol & drug intoxication… a rip off …not true ecstasy.

2. Smoking/drugging… a rip off… not real air/oxygen…energy.

3. Nationalism…a rip off… not true-united-brotherhood-of-global-fellow-fragile-life seeking the unselfish best interests of all.

4. Fame & Fortune… a rip off… not true friendship nor true security…

“There are companions ready to crush one another; But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” PRO verbs 18:24

“For wisdom is a protection just as money is a protection, but the advantage of knowledge is this: Wisdom preserves the life of its owner.” Eccl. 7:12

“The wealth of the rich is his fortified city; It is like a protective wall in his imagination.” PRO verbs 18:11

5. Latest technology… a rip off… IF mostly misused to hurt rather than help/heal…(Or to silence/kill instead of communicating/interacting/living/moving).

6. FAKE Religion/Big Business…Fake Government…Fake Media/Fake mind-food aka fake knowledge/fake leadership…inaccurate/insufficient misinformation/propaganda, no actual evidence, etc….a rip off… not TRUE satisfying spirituality (or leadership) leading aka setting example worthy of imitation/modeling…leading to TRUE peace (and life/longevity eternal).

“One whose appetite is satisfied turns down honey from the comb, But to the hungry, even what is bitter tastes sweet.” PRO verbs 27:7

“And I heard another voice out of heaven say: “Get out of her (fake religion), my people, if you do not want to share with her in her sins, and if you do not want to receive part of her plagues.” Revelation 18:4

7. War games/violence… a rip off… not a viable solution/resolution to conflict …”those who take up the sword… perish by the sword!”

“Then Jesus said to him: “Return your sword to its place, for all those who take up the sword will perish by the sword.” Matthew 26:52

“As a city broken through, without a wall, is the man who cannot control his temper.” PRO verbs 25:28

(a limited list; e.g., not extensive… obviously;

I’m sure You could think of other rip-offs to add.)

Accurate Knowledge… along with proactive-POSITIVE Psychological tactics/non-combative/”spiritual” warfare…(in my POV) is like non-invasive, bloodless, precise, mind surgery… with better outcomes!… respecting the sacredness/preciousness of life!:)

“By patience a commander is won over, and a gentle (mild) tongue can break a bone.” PRO verbs 25:15

“Like an earring of gold and an ornament of fine gold is a wise reprover to a receptive ear.” PRO verb 25:12

“A mild answer turns away rage, But a harsh word stirs up anger.” PRO verb 15:1

“If your enemy (the one hating you) is hungry, give him bread to eat; If he is thirsty, give him water to drink. For you will be heaping burning coals on his head (that is to soften the person and melt his hardness), and Jehovah (True God of Compassion) will reward you.” PRO verbs 25:22

Put away from yourselves every kind of malicious bitterness, anger, wrath, screaming, and abusive speech, as well as everything injurious. 32 But become kind to one another, tenderly compassionate, freely forgiving one another just as God also by Christ freely forgave you.” Ephesians 4:31, 32

PEACE Reader:)… keep up the fully-awake-wise-fine-fight:  Soldier of Compassion!:)

11/04/17 @ 12:00 p.m.

Is a house… truly a home without peace & compassion & agape (unselfish) love??… what about our beautiful planet Earth with all its inhabitants?! (Would You agree?…Each family member aka fellow-fragile-life has a personal responsibility to contribute/maintain/sustain home aka Earth.)

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A Mild Tongue

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A gentle tongue can break a bone.Prov. 25:15.

In my POV, the silent treatment is less effective than a mild tongue.  To effectuate positive change(s)…is ignoring the person and/or the problem (indefinitely) a mature course of action/non-action?! Gentle speech even when under provocation can have better results.

A mild* gentle answer turns away rage,

But a harsh* painful word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1

(Sometimes, i analyze/wonder IF certain areas/aspects of my life/relationships would improve IF i was a better communicator?) Gentle and compassionate communication certainly contributes to PEACE!

We all contribute to (emotional) climate…may be the ultimate climate control is a mild tongue!:)

PEACE always Reader:)

i’ll contribute to the quiet/serenity and shut up now;)

6/2/17 @ 11:22 a.m.

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Undeserved Kindness: a Motivation

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a biblical term…

“A Greek word with the central idea of that which is agreeable and winsome. The word is often used to refer to a kind gift or a kind manner of giving. When referring to the undeserved kindness of God, the word describes a free gift given generously by God, with no expectation of repayment. Thus, it is an expression of God’s bounteous giving and generous love and kindness toward humans. The Greek term is also rendered by such expressions as “favor” and “kind gift.” It is given unearned and unmerited, motivated solely by the generosity of the giver.” (excerpted New World Translation of the Holy Scriptures, revised edition 2013, glossary)

If You/i hav ever been the recipient of an unearned gift…motivated solely by generosity of the Giver, would that positively impact our feelings of gratitude? or our feelings of warmth/love toward the giver? Would repeated acts of undeserved kindness motivate a person to live differently? or to give more freely? or to be more forgiving? or more compassionate?

for example, in my life…i’ve experienced such kindness. (and repeatedly!) So, to the best of my (limited) abilities/circumstances, etc…i strive to live a life of gratitude/appreciation…especially toward the God of Compassion and Undeserved Kindness. (Undeserved kindness plays a prominent role in my daily decisions.)

just a thought, when viewing life as an undeserved kindness, are there less complaints? dissatisfaction? or gratefulness…for one’s lot in life? less risk taking that would endanger one’s life or someone else’s?

in my POV, and through my study of the scriptures, and through my life experiences…there are many undeserved kindnesses…Generous Gifts from God! These (and other reasons) motivate me to be as comforting and caring and helpful to fellow-fragile-life as humanly possible.

However, while i respect that all of us need specific-practical help in a physical sense…i place a higher value on spiritual wellness. Spiritual health first, physical health second. It’s been my experience that spiritual well-being…has a positive, long-term, rippling effect(s) on physical well-being. (Spiritual Peace leads to Physical Peace.)

“Let us, then, approach the throne of undeserved kindness with freeness of speech, so that we may receive mercy and find undeserved kindness to help us at the right time.” (Hebrews 4:16)


9/20/16 @ 4:17 a.m.

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Straws & Sticks

attitude communication Joan Winifred kindness
straws & sticks??…
i’ve been studying…(what else is new joanie? that everyday;) well, i was at a morning educational workshop for parents at my girls’ school…on “Increasing Thinking Skills Through Higher Level Questions…
“Traditional thinking is all about “what is” — Future thinking will also need to be about “what can be”.~Edward de Bono
i like that thinking…of:  what can be…Be-ing?
Questions..i love them & (i don’t mind answering them)…or “attempting” to find satisfactory/logical/reasonable/makes sense…answers.
May be IF ? all of us asked more questions…higher level ?s…we would find higher level answers! Could that lead to higher level living?!
Today, i’ve been “thinking” yep!…i do that too;)…about justice. Read this:
for with the judgment you are judging, you will be judged, and with the measure that you are measuring out, they will measure out to you. 3 Why, then, do you look at the straw in your brother’s eye but do not notice the rafter in your own eye? 4 Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Allow me to remove the straw from your eye,’ when look! a rafter is in your own eye? 5Hypocrite! First remove the rafter from your own eye, and then you will see clearly how to remove the straw from your brother’s eye.
(Matthew 7:1-5)
With a rafter in our eye… seeing is distorted/twisted/negative/critical/limited/limiting/unhealthy (insert any description you like)…as a parent, i’ve thought about: IF i see something negative/undesirable/offensive…in my kid’s behavior/speech, etc….i ask: did my kid learn that from me? what can i change/modify (about myself first) that could better exemplify a “positive” trait (e.g., kindness or compassion or forgiveness, industriousness, etc.) i would like to see displayed in my kid’s behavior/speech, etc..
Thinking about: “what can be” : healthy relationships w/everyone (including parents and kids):
Why should we not be quick to look for the faults in our fellow-fragile-life?
 How can our daily interactions benefit by removing the big stick from our own eye?
A rafter can be a support beam of wood…”A straw could be a small piece of grass. A rafter, on the other hand, is a bulky length of timber used to hold up the roof of a house.”
IF we choose to solely focus on the negative, aggravating, or offensive traits found in any one of us...relationships suffer/die…& who can carry a rafter or rafters (and continuously for a long length of time?)!
When we choose to focus on: the positive, good, wonderful traits found in any of us…relationships flourish/grow/live.
How can each of us keep our relationships/family/friends…alive & healthy? (Choosing straws?) everybody wins (at the game of compassion!) 🙂
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Limitless Kindness

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Watching an interview of an African Woman was enlightening/encouraging.
She made a salient comment on kindness; the inspiration for this post.
(I will paraphrase and expand.)
Her statement/point was along the lines of: ‘Usually as humans, when our kindness is not reciprocated by ? (another in the manner we would prefer), naturally, we stop being kind.’ (My expansion: Thereby limiting our own display/depth of kindness.)
She made me think/evaluate the depth and display of my personal kindness. Thus, as humans, we limit our kindness and the cultivation of the positive trait within ourselves. (We stunt our compassion growth.) IF someone does not return it: kind in kind…well, we stop the relationship aka exchange of kindness with this particular person. Which limits communication and inhibits growth of the particular relationship.

Our (mature) kindness IS limitless (like mature love)… it cannot be limited by reciprocity or dependency upon it.

(i find) Mature kinds are kind at all times! 🙂

For further reading please see:

“Carry on with one another loving-kindness.”—Zechariah 7:9
“Carry on” means to continue without stopping/letup…persevere…an on-line description: to continue to live, work, etc., despite a setback or tragedy; persevere.

“When we feel love and kindness toward others, it not only makes others feel loved and cared for, but it helps us also to develop inner happiness and peace.”

—The 14th Dalai Lama (1935)

How many precious relationships/families/friendships/partnerships would be preserved/respected with limitless Kindness?!

Is our Kindness limit………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..less?
Insights/Benefits from Biblical narratives/accounts
19 The Bible accounts […] underscore the fact that loving-kindness is to be shown to those who have a need that they themselves cannot fill. In order to continue his family line, Abraham needed Bethuel’s cooperation. To have his remains taken to Canaan, Jacob needed Joseph’s help. And to produce an heir, Naomi needed Ruth’s assistance. Neither Abraham, Jacob, nor Naomi could fill those needs without help. Similarly today, loving-kindness should especially be shown to those in need. (Proverbs 19:17) We should imitate the patriarch Job, who gave attention to “the afflicted one crying for help, and the fatherless boy and anyone that had no helper” as well as to “the one about to perish.” Job also ‘made glad the heart of the widow’ and became ‘eyes to the blind and feet to the lame.’— Job 29:12-15. Excerpted: Showing Loving-Kindness to Those in Need w/02 5/15
Since You LOVE to ?…who can You help? THANKS for being one of a kind!:)

Since i LOVE to talk (and probably toooo much), may i be the mouth to the voiceless? -lol:)…

(note to self: joanie this lesson is about limitless kindness…not limitless babbling.)…”Many minds don’t mind being kind.” ~jw

“Tenderness and kindness are not signs of weakness and despair, but manifestations of strength and resolution.”

—Kahlil Gibran (1883-1931)

Discovered this UPlifting song… (check it out/listen IF YOU can)…”This is the best life ever”..”i wanna live for more than me, i wanna give till i feel free…this is the best feeling ever”….Download song here

found these on-line: highlighted what resonates with me…

This world would like – to – make me – lonely
But I got – my friends – with me
We’re trying hard – to help – other’s find – friend’s eternally

Ah ah ah, when I would worry about me
Uuu, this world would bring me down
Ah ah ah, I’m feeling better – lifting others – off the ground
Look what I found


Ah ah, I wanna know what I can’t do,
I wanna give what I can give
That is the best feeling ever
Ah ah, I know this will last forever
I’m where I wanna be
This is the best life ever

So many good things yet to be done
With these two hands of mine
I’ll take some love and build us a bridge
Connect your heart to mine

Ah ah ah, when I would worry about me
Uuu, this world would bring me down
Ah ah ah ah ah… I’m feeling better – lifting others – off the ground
Look what I found


Ah ah, I wanna know what I can’t do,
I wanna give what I can give
That is the best feeling ever
Ah ah, I know this will last forever
Is better than a dream
This is the best life….

I’m not afraid come what may
This kind of life gets better every day, every day, every way

Oh, oh, oh, oh…
Ah ah, I wanna live for more than me
I wanna give till I feel free
That is the best feeling ever
Ah ah, I know this will last forever
Come with me you’ll see
This is the best life ever
This is the best life ever
This is the best life ever.

YAY!:)..i just found this song on Youtube…pretty sentiments & makes me think: am i/are You living the best life ever?…You/me/we can!…(being loyal/kind…during tough times!) 🙂


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Counsel vs. Criticism

attitude communication compassion insights Joan Winifred kindness things i learned wisdom

How do You help someone who is LOST…in their own mind?!


we all need it…including me (very much so)!!

Criticism?…most of us get that...ouch and it can cut deep!! Most of us reject it…especially when harsh and unwarranted.

Aren’t they “technically” the same thing?

What i’ve learned about the 2 and how to differentiate between criticism & counsel:

tactful suggestions are helpful & given in a spirit of mildness and kindness…can help one avoid regret, danger or damage..physically, mentally, emotionally & spiritually.

manner:  NOT bossy but  sincere & loving

counsel is NOT making an issue out of a non-issue!!!…that would be harsh and/or unwarranted/unreasonable criticism.

Wisdom is a protection–can safeguard us from all kinds of dangers…

Genuine & effective counsel helps brings out the beauty (positive qualities) in all of us!:)

Listen to counsel and accept discipline, In order to become wise in your future. (Proverbs 19:20)

The Bible contains real-life experiences of individuals who received needed counsel.

difficult to accept counsel? The basic problem […] pride, each thinking too highly of himself. Many bring grief on themselves because of this trait. They seem to feel that acknowledging counsel implies some deficiency in them or hurts their reputation. But pride is a weakness. Pride beclouds a person’s thinking so that he tends to resist the help provided […]

The way of the fool is right in his own eyes, But the wise one accepts advice. (Proverbs 12:15)

 “All of you gird yourselves with lowliness of mind toward one another, because God opposes the haughty ones, but he gives undeserved kindness to the humble ones.” (1 Peter 5:5)

Consider Moses, whose father-in-law gave him counsel on how to handle his heavy work load. Moses listened to him and immediately applied it. (Exodus 18:13-24) Although Moses had great authority, why was he receptive to counsel? Because he was humble. “Moses was by far the meekest of all the men who were upon the surface of the ground.” (Numbers 12:3)

“Let each one keep seeking, not his own advantage, but that of the other person. . . . “

Beloved King David whose heart was very agreeable to the God of Compassion aka Yahweh & David’s heart (inner person) was agreeable to Men…He accepted counsel/discipline even though he had a lot power:

King David committed adultery with Bath-sheba and tried to cover it up by having her husband, Uriah, killed. Jehovah(Yahweh) sent the prophet Nathan to reprove David. He was repentant and quickly admitted: “I have sinned against Jehovah.” (2 Samuel 12:13)

King David knew the benefit of listening to sound counsel. […] he thanked God for the one through whom it came. (1 Samuel 25:32-35) Are we like that? If so, we will be safeguarded against saying and doing many things that could cause regret.

Closely related to humility is concern for the welfare of others.

Do you put the welfare of other people ahead of your own personal preference? ~Excerpts:  Listen to Counsel, Accept Discipline

When we wisely accept counsel to seek not our own advantage…we truly strive to live compassion. We chose to make choices that heal and help ourselves and all Breathing-Fragile-Life. 🙂


The Greatest Musician..plays (a new song)…strings:


chellist?- nah

violinist? nah

HEART!!!!!!!!!!!!!!…strings…just right.

All of us can enter a room and choose to be refreshing to those around us… by being friendly and kind…forgiving attitude. And IF for whatever reason (hopefully motivated by genuine concern/agape love), we need to bring something to someone’s attention…let’s do so in a manner that will encourage and truly help!:)

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