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Category Archives: lamentations of the heart

Apex Predator(s)

attitude compassion hope Joan Winifred lamentations of the heart

Dingo dogs

among others… are considered A.P. (i.e. man has dominated man to his own injury, and what about woman??)

(On the watch and look out…)

A.P…

Including the GRIEF messing with my mind!… hurting heart.

The battle of my own mind…i have to fight off my (deep) grief
Before it
Kills
Me. (and at the moment i am not down for the count; my sparring continues)

sorrowing/weeping for you……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..and me…and Others, Puerto Rico and the Islands, etc. and the isolated ones… who think they’re an unreachable/untouchable island of security.

My heart weeps for those who sleep…(spiritually) who settle for the mundane routines of life and the ways of death.

I also have to destroy the selfishness in me…in order to continue forward on my spiritual path of living compassion and agape love… to the fullest extent.

I must conquer… and not be conquered! i will. come off victorious! (with God’s help, of course.)

Hope and faith… an anchor sure.

What is today’s date & time?… another day to make a little difference…”there is more happiness in giving…”

9/26/17 @ 5:24 a.m.

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quivering ribbons of a hemorrhaging heart…

Joan Winifred lamentations of the heart

of an emotionally bleeding heart

an

inner/figurative
heart
flogged… and whipped about…(a crushed spirit and a reed bent over)

and
scourged
by
the grief..
struggling
and
suffering of the

(imperfect) human
condition…(immediate and global of the so-called small and of the so-called noble)

 

The usual instrument was a short whip (flagrum or flagellum) with several single or braided leather thongs of variable lengths, in which small iron balls or sharp pieces of sheep bones were tied at intervals… As the Roman soldiers repeatedly struck the victim’s back with full force, the iron balls would cause deep contusions, and the leather thongs and sheep bones would cut into the skin and subcutaneous tissues. Then, as the flogging continued, the lacerations would tear into the underlying skeletal muscles and produce quivering ribbons of bleeding flesh. [Dr. William D. Edwards in The Journal of American Medical Association describes the Roman practice of scourging.]

 

{No…i don’t hide/escape away in apathy or acceptance or tolerance without limits.}

 

Not numb

and

not dumb…(ing)

it

down

[i drink up the real. The excruciatingly hot and the icy cold.]

 

11:21 a.m. 9/24/17

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YUCK!

Joan Winifred lamentations of the heart

M(t.) E(verest) …scaling…(it gets tiring one mountain peak after another…)

eating my words
every day

yum
yum
YUCK!

There is something you should understand about the way I work. When you need me but do not want me, then I must stay. When you want me but no longer need me, then I have to go. It’s rather sad, really, but there it is. (Nanny McPhee)

it’s saaaaaaaaaadddd
really
it
is (that is the nature of my work…in a stupid quippy sum)

but
ya know
(spiritual) height has
its
advantages/perspectives…(real reality of no escape…ism)

sigh,sigh
sigh
when
it’s
HIGH

(and low..low-er….lowest worm of the earth am i ?)

GO…

od

(trying to do good means hating what’s bad/non-compassionate) or avoiding/fleeing what leaves a bad… taste in mouth…indigestion and ultimately, death…behind.

i am feeling depressed…dark guitar…mood…let it riff

(letting my heart rip)

8/17/17 @ 12:31 a.m.

 

8/17/17 @ 5:03 p.m…i’ve known (aka i’ve experienced/am experiencing) God has the superglue…to mend the broken-hearted.

 

8/17/17 @ 7:32 p.m.

please, just……….leave me alone (till ?)…(the sun comes out tomorrow:)…

8/17/17 @ 7:39 p.m. back to the tree graveyard i head…

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‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”= (Purple) Tears & (read)Fire(s)

Joan Winifred lamentations of the heart

‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”””'”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”””‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘””‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”””‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘”‘ tears and 🔥(fire) find myself crying at random times. (I would die 4 u.) It seems alot harder living for u though! Loss of life saddens me deeply, the people, the trees, the animals…unnumbered by cruel man. Cleaning up is healing work-ing with my plants that survived. Not surprising: Some types of messes are torturous for me. May be?? idk, in some ways we got off easy, feeling for Others:(  i am super-sensitive right now (and I don’t want to talk to/see anybody at the moment.) My own emotions are a heavy weight… cannot carry anybody’s else’s..praying for Others that I am unable to help.
Everything is fresh and new tomorrow; deep down positivity always lingers, but am very tired..
Finding solace in song… “Filled with catastrophe” …

Never giving up!compassion is an ever- burning flame!!!!!!!!!!!:)

9/16/17 @ 8:11 p.m.

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Sickness and Sadness

Joan Winifred lamentations of the heart never giving up! pain poetry reality

Obvious observation (by me)

there are a LOT [of] sick-nesses…(each with sad-specific symptoms/sufferings) 🙁

—————————————————————————————————————————-

ALTITUDE

(at times; a HIGH place of utter loneliness and misunderstanding…rejection and hatred (by the many and the masked))…

above-see level…

(living (?); yep. existing/operating/functioning/working…(compassion))


attitude

lowliness of mind/humility…brings you there (spiritually) high–ALTITUDE!

 

let’s go fly

a

kite

and LAUGH

though

crying

inside

while

outside

stormy days…..pass away

 

8/28/17 @ 3:17 p.m.

 

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Can You See??

attitude comfort God hope Joan Winifred lamentations of the heart never giving up! patience trust

“the beauty through the ….” (i like this verse)

{yeah, and seeing the hope through the despair… the “master of my” SEE}

“And He (God) will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore. The former things have passed away.” (Revelation 21:4)…{i Love this verse}

Death and pain’s raining reign will end…believe it! 

{i trust in God (of Compassion/Yahweh/Jehovah) and not man to solve longevity concerns.}

8/26/17 @ 9:16 p.m.

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Proximity

attitude conscientious-ness Joan Winifred lamentations of the heart things i learned

my choices brought me to this place (figuratively and literally)

this proximity?

 

why? and how? did Your choices

bring You…

here?

there?

no

where

near

me

 

distance and closeness choice & chance

(banished…by…(choice/chance))
(everybody grieves for something/someone…by choice/chance??)

(6/5/17 @ 12:49 p.m. last/previous (before today’s quick edit) edited–published 6/6/17 @ 1:33 p.m.)

a P.S.
to paraphase a loyal man…”i opened my mouth to the True God and cannot turn back”…
i only have the power to move forward!

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WHY???

compassion conscientious-ness Joan Winifred justice lamentations of the heart

why

did

i have to become

“aware”

of

YOU!

why can’t i just go about my business, my life…and forget about you!!

though,

you know

you can’t help it, can ya?? (nope)

bunnies can’t help being bunnies (fluffy/cuddly)

and

crocodiles can’t help being crocodiles (snappy)

and

snakes

snakes

and butterflies, butterflies

would it be nice IF i could just FLY away……………………………………………………………..ugh.

flowers can’t help being flowers (fragrant)

and plants, plants

and

doggies, doggies and

cats, cats

and

ants…

everybody’s hungry, thirsty, whatever, whatever…

spiritually, physically and emotionally/mentally

i sound so arrogant!…i know (aka understand to some degree) compassionately caring/and/or giving is another word for “privilege.” Cause the capacity to care (help) be aware…on a deeper level…(i think) springs from a vast (spiritual) wealth.

5/5/17 @ 9:29 p.m.

 

believe me, i am really nothing

(just caring (may be cause i can)/doing what i should be)

and maybe i should being doing MORE…(being kind-er to all kinds, etc) justice means…compassion; (i think/feel.)

5/5/17 @ 9:33 p.m.

God, just writing this (post)…i am? so self-absorbed..i am making myself sick.

(This life is not about me.) 9:36 p.m.

 

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Drinking my Medicine

conscientious-ness Joan Winifred lamentations of the heart worries

oh yummy!

yummy!

can you read/sense my sarcastic tone!??

 

(medicine aka self-discipline/self-control/reality check(s))

 

i don’t like the taste…much, but hey, i have faith/trust ultimately its good for me.

 

{WHY DO I ? HAVE TO CARE…so MUCH!!}

may be i’d rather feel than be apathetic/complacent.

 

5/5/17 @ 9:12 p.m.

(had a really good productive day 2/ accomplished a lot! of what i would term “good” mostly known as compassionate stuff)

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