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Straws & Sticks

attitude communication Joan Winifred kindness
straws & sticks??…
i’ve been studying…(what else is new joanie?..do that everyday;) well, i was at a morning educational workshop for parents at my girls’ school…on “Increasing Thinking Skills Through Higher Level Questions…
“Traditional thinking is all about “what is” — Future thinking will also need to be about “what can be”.~Edward de Bono
i like that thinking…of:  what can be…Be-ing?
Questions..i love them & (i don’t mind answering them)…or “attempting” to find satisfactory/logical/reasonable/makes sense…answers.
May be IF ? all of us asked more questions…higher level ?s…we would find higher level answers! Could that lead to higher level living?!
Today, i’ve been “thinking” yep!…i do that too;)…about justice. Read this:
for with the judgment you are judging, you will be judged, and with the measure that you are measuring out, they will measure out to you. 3 Why, then, do you look at the straw in your brother’s eye but do not notice the rafter in your own eye? 4 Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Allow me to remove the straw from your eye,’ when look! a rafter is in your own eye? 5Hypocrite! First remove the rafter from your own eye, and then you will see clearly how to remove the straw from your brother’s eye.
(Matthew 7:1-5)
With a rafter in our eye… seeing is distorted/twisted/negative/critical/limited/limiting/unhealthy (insert any description you like)…as a parent, i’ve thought about: IF i see something negative/undesirable/offensive…in my kid’s behavior/speech, etc….i ask: did my kid learn that from me? what can i change/modify (about myself first) that could better exemplify a “positive” trait (e.g., kindness or compassion or forgiveness, industriousness, etc.) i would like to see displayed in my kid’s behavior/speech, etc..
Thinking about: “what can be” : healthy relationships w/everyone (including parents and kids):
Why should we not be quick to look for the faults in our fellow-fragile-life?
 How can our daily interactions benefit by removing the big stick from our own eye?
A rafter can be a support beam of wood…”A straw could be a small piece of grass. A rafter, on the other hand, is a bulky length of timber used to hold up the roof of a house.”
IF we choose to solely focus on the negative, aggravating, or offensive traits found in any one of us...relationships suffer/die…& who can carry a rafter or rafters (and continuously for a long length of time?)!
When we choose to focus on: the positive, good, wonderful traits found in any of us…relationships flourish/grow/live.
How can each of us keep our relationships/family/friends…alive & healthy? (Choosing straws?) everybody wins (at the game of compassion!) 🙂
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