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communication Joan Winifred kindness peace

A Mild Tongue

A gentle tongue can break a bone.Prov. 25:15.

In my POV, the silent treatment is less effective than a mild tongue.  To effectuate positive change(s)…is ignoring the person and/or the problem (indefinitely) a mature course of action/non-action?! Gentle speech even when under provocation can have better results.

A mild* gentle answer turns away rage,

But a harsh* painful word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1

(Sometimes, i analyze/wonder IF certain areas/aspects of my life/relationships would improve IF i was a better communicator?) Gentle and compassionate communication certainly contributes to PEACE!

We all contribute to (emotional) climate…may be the ultimate climate control is a mild tongue!:)

PEACE always Reader:)

i’ll contribute to the quiet/serenity and shut up now;)

6/2/17 @ 11:22 a.m.

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attitude communication Joan Winifred kindness

Straws & Sticks

straws & sticks??…
i’ve been studying…(what else is new joanie? that everyday;) well, i was at a morning educational workshop for parents at my girls’ school…on “Increasing Thinking Skills Through Higher Level Questions…
“Traditional thinking is all about “what is” — Future thinking will also need to be about “what can be”.~Edward de Bono
i like that thinking…of:  what can be…Be-ing?
Questions..i love them & (i don’t mind answering them)…or “attempting” to find satisfactory/logical/reasonable/makes sense…answers.
May be IF ? all of us asked more questions…higher level ?s…we would find higher level answers! Could that lead to higher level living?!
Today, i’ve been “thinking” yep!…i do that too;)…about justice. Read this:
for with the judgment you are judging, you will be judged, and with the measure that you are measuring out, they will measure out to you. 3 Why, then, do you look at the straw in your brother’s eye but do not notice the rafter in your own eye? 4 Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Allow me to remove the straw from your eye,’ when look! a rafter is in your own eye? 5Hypocrite! First remove the rafter from your own eye, and then you will see clearly how to remove the straw from your brother’s eye.
(Matthew 7:1-5)
With a rafter in our eye… seeing is distorted/twisted/negative/critical/limited/limiting/unhealthy (insert any description you like)…as a parent, i’ve thought about: IF i see something negative/undesirable/offensive…in my kid’s behavior/speech, etc….i ask: did my kid learn that from me? what can i change/modify (about myself first) that could better exemplify a “positive” trait (e.g., kindness or compassion or forgiveness, industriousness, etc.) i would like to see displayed in my kid’s behavior/speech, etc..
Thinking about: “what can be” : healthy relationships w/everyone (including parents and kids):
Why should we not be quick to look for the faults in our fellow-fragile-life?
 How can our daily interactions benefit by removing the big stick from our own eye?
A rafter can be a support beam of wood…”A straw could be a small piece of grass. A rafter, on the other hand, is a bulky length of timber used to hold up the roof of a house.”
IF we choose to solely focus on the negative, aggravating, or offensive traits found in any one of us...relationships suffer/die…& who can carry a rafter or rafters (and continuously for a long length of time?)!
When we choose to focus on: the positive, good, wonderful traits found in any of us…relationships flourish/grow/live.
How can each of us keep our relationships/family/friends…alive & healthy? (Choosing straws?) everybody wins (at the game of compassion!) 🙂
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attitude Joan Winifred kindness

Limitless Kindness

Watching an interview of an African Woman was enlightening/encouraging.
She made a salient comment on kindness; the inspiration for this post.
(I will paraphrase and expand.)
Her statement/point was along the lines of: ‘Usually as humans, when our kindness is not reciprocated by ? (another in the manner we would prefer), naturally, we stop being kind.’ (My expansion: Thereby limiting our own display/depth of kindness.)
She made me think/evaluate the depth and display of my personal kindness. Thus, as humans, we limit our kindness and the cultivation of the positive trait within ourselves. (We stunt our compassion growth.) IF someone does not return it: kind in kind…well, we stop the relationship aka exchange of kindness with this particular person. Which limits communication and inhibits growth of the particular relationship.

Our (mature) kindness IS limitless (like mature love)… it cannot be limited by reciprocity or dependency upon it.

(i find) Mature kinds are kind at all times! 🙂

For further reading please see:

“Carry on with one another loving-kindness.”—Zechariah 7:9
“Carry on” means to continue without stopping/letup…persevere…an on-line description: to continue to live, work, etc., despite a setback or tragedy; persevere.

“When we feel love and kindness toward others, it not only makes others feel loved and cared for, but it helps us also to develop inner happiness and peace.”

—The 14th Dalai Lama (1935)

How many precious relationships/families/friendships/partnerships would be preserved/respected with limitless Kindness?!

Is our Kindness limit………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..less?
Insights/Benefits from Biblical narratives/accounts
19 The Bible accounts […] underscore the fact that loving-kindness is to be shown to those who have a need that they themselves cannot fill. In order to continue his family line, Abraham needed Bethuel’s cooperation. To have his remains taken to Canaan, Jacob needed Joseph’s help. And to produce an heir, Naomi needed Ruth’s assistance. Neither Abraham, Jacob, nor Naomi could fill those needs without help. Similarly today, loving-kindness should especially be shown to those in need. (Proverbs 19:17) We should imitate the patriarch Job, who gave attention to “the afflicted one crying for help, and the fatherless boy and anyone that had no helper” as well as to “the one about to perish.” Job also ‘made glad the heart of the widow’ and became ‘eyes to the blind and feet to the lame.’— Job 29:12-15. Excerpted: Showing Loving-Kindness to Those in Need w/02 5/15
Since You LOVE to ?…who can You help? THANKS for being one of a kind!:)

Since i LOVE to talk (and probably toooo much), may i be the mouth to the voiceless? -lol:)…

(note to self: joanie this lesson is about limitless kindness…not limitless babbling.)…”Many minds don’t mind being kind.” ~jw

“Tenderness and kindness are not signs of weakness and despair, but manifestations of strength and resolution.”

—Kahlil Gibran (1883-1931)

Discovered this UPlifting song… (check it out/listen IF YOU can)…”This is the best life ever”..”i wanna live for more than me, i wanna give till i feel free…this is the best feeling ever”….Download song here

found these on-line: highlighted what resonates with me…

This world would like – to – make me – lonely
But I got – my friends – with me
We’re trying hard – to help – other’s find – friend’s eternally

Ah ah ah, when I would worry about me
Uuu, this world would bring me down
Ah ah ah, I’m feeling better – lifting others – off the ground
Look what I found


Ah ah, I wanna know what I can’t do,
I wanna give what I can give
That is the best feeling ever
Ah ah, I know this will last forever
I’m where I wanna be
This is the best life ever

So many good things yet to be done
With these two hands of mine
I’ll take some love and build us a bridge
Connect your heart to mine

Ah ah ah, when I would worry about me
Uuu, this world would bring me down
Ah ah ah ah ah… I’m feeling better – lifting others – off the ground
Look what I found


Ah ah, I wanna know what I can’t do,
I wanna give what I can give
That is the best feeling ever
Ah ah, I know this will last forever
Is better than a dream
This is the best life….

I’m not afraid come what may
This kind of life gets better every day, every day, every way

Oh, oh, oh, oh…
Ah ah, I wanna live for more than me
I wanna give till I feel free
That is the best feeling ever
Ah ah, I know this will last forever
Come with me you’ll see
This is the best life ever
This is the best life ever
This is the best life ever.

YAY!:)..i just found this song on Youtube…pretty sentiments & makes me think: am i/are You living the best life ever?…You/me/we can!…(being loyal/kind…during tough times!) 🙂


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